Category Archives: Uncategorized

Every time it looks as if I’m about to have a perfect day, my people do something to ruin the moment. Case in point: Today’s Mandell JCC Doggie Duathlon/Dash.

As if basking in the glory of being Connecticut’s most famous dog, greeting kids and looking cute wasn’t awesome enough, our book signing table was right next to the Oma’s Pride table. That’s right — the raw dog food people. I got treats left and right, and the nice man talking to people about this raw diet even gave me a bone. Like, a real bone. A disgusting, juicy, awesome bone. You could not imagine how happy I was.

My favorite type of dog — the Shiny Black Dog — was present in abundance. Although I thought everyone was there just to see me, the day was actually about dogs who swim one lap in a pool (crazy) and then run with their people (sorta cool.) Man, those shiny black dogs are excellent swimmers. I think. I don’t know. I was too busy gnawing on that bone to notice. Plus, I hate swimming, as you may have gathered from previous blog posts.

So the event was coming to a close, my person was packing things up, and then it happened: She put me in the kiddie pool. At first I thought they were saying I was going in the kitty pool, which would have been great, since I am kind of obsessed with chasing cats.

But no. I was subjected to the shame of “swimming” in eight inches of water, after seeing all of those big dogs paddle their way across a real pool.

I really don’t mean to be such a diva, especially since I walked away with a second totally icky and wonderful bone. But the kiddie pool? Come on. Show a girl a little respect.

You know those “accident prone” dogs? The ones who are always at the vet for some sort of injury or accidental ingestion? The ones who single-handedly pay the veterinarian’s cable bill and kids’ college tuition?

I am not that dog, really. Despite the stories you may have heard about me eating a pound of raw ground beef and an entire batch of double chocolate cookies, I really am an easy going dog. The hamburger was shaped into these cute little sliders, and they were left right there on the counter, so how was I supposed to know they weren’t for me? And the chocolate cookies?  Please. Those were just begging to be eaten.

And yes, the unfortunate photograph my person chose to use for this post makes it looks like I’ve gotten into trouble again. But I’m pretty sure it wasn’t my fault. I really can’t tell you what happened because it’s all a bit of a blur now. Let’s just go with it not being my fault.

The nice veterinarian said my dew claw got pulled away from the quick. That’s apparently disgusting, since people make funny faces every time someone says it. I have to wear this bandage for a week, which you’d think would be awful, but is actually a ticket to more treats and hugs.

So don’t feel bad for me, really. I’m fine. And please don’t call me accident prone. Maybe I just like going to the vet, OK?

Because I’m perfectly medium (2011 and 2012 champion: Most Medium Dog in Farmington’s Doozy of a Dog Contest), and because I’m so flipping cute, my people are often asked about my breed. I am, of course, a Little Brown Dog.

“She’s the perfect size,” they gush.

“Now that’s the kind of dog I’d like,” they say, while considering life with an incredibly medium dog like me.

Well, here’s your chance. On Saturday, Sept. 8, this little Tennessee lady — who, luckily for her, looks just like me! — will arrive in Connecticut, and will live in a foster home in Farmington until some nice family adopts her.

Her name is presently Jelena, but you could call her anything you want, really. Stuey and I can’t wait to meet her! She’s about 25 lbs., about 9 months old, and loves sleeping in her crate.

(She’s apparently house-trained, too, but I think that’s a bit too personal, and I’d really appreciate it if you people would stop talking about our pooping and peeing as if we’re not in the room. It’s embarrassing.)

Now, about the tiara. I know! It’s awesome, right? I hope she lets me borrow it when she gets here!

If you’d like more information about this Little Brown Dog, please visit www.emilysfriendsrescue.com or email jan@emilysfriendsrescue.com.

So I was sniffing with this Schnauzer the other day and he told me something that really bummed me out. He told me that his people actually go away all day to work. I mean, sure, it’s fine if they want to work, since we enjoy those expensive bully sticks.

But gone? All day? My person’s “office” is the front porch, where she can watch me bark at all of the cyclists and runners going by. I know she loves it when I do that, because she always yells “Stuey!” when I start to bark. I love my job.

Sometimes I think I might make it a little difficult for her to work. Sometimes I can’t help but lick her face when she’s doing those boring phone interviews. And I do sort of feel bad about the times I accidentally step on her laptop and delete her writing. But I’m pretty sure she’s happy to have me as an office-mate.

Here’s a photo she took of me working hard. This was right before I fetched her a coffee and made some copies. I’m allowed a little break every now and then, aren’t I?

 

Because I’m generally a nudist, I don’t give much thought to fashion. Sure, my humans buy me the best collar-and-leash ensembles from the most exclusive boutiques (Green Dog Market in Farmington, Leaps & Bones in South Windsor.) But I try to avoid wearing anything that will detract from my expressive eyes and awesome white paws.

But today? I rocked this neckerchief. Right? My author and I were signing books and looking cute (well, she signed books and I looked cute) at the Coventry Regional Farmers’ Market, and this nice lady came over and gave me this adorable accessory. Probably because I’m so flipping cute and famous and she wanted me to showcase it for her, just like designers do for people like Sarah Jessica Parker.

Despite my usual au naturel look, I do think I look pretty awesome in this. I just might make wearing clothes a habit.

 

You wouldn’t believe the week Stuey and I have had with our people! We’ve been banana boating, hiking, swimming and biking along the shores of Lake Champlain in Vermont. We’ve enjoyed local, fresh foods, and …

Who are we kidding? Our people totally ditched us while they went on vacation. The worst part? They left us with the trainer. She’s, like, crazy-tough on us, and doesn’t let us get away with anything.

I have never been more humiliated. I mean, I could see leaving my annoying little brother with the lady who insists that we sleep in a crate and actually listen to her. But me? Doesn’t she know who I am?

I demand to be included in the next family vacation. I’ll start packing now.

Can you believe it? I’m 14 today! My people keep saying I’m just 2 years old today, but I know that the only real way to count years is in dog years. Plus, being a teenager is so much cooler than being a toddler, don’t you think? Most rescue dogs don’t know their actual birthdates, but the nice lady who scooped me up and saved me when I was just a puppy said I was between five and six weeks old when she found me over Labor Day weekend in 2010.

I haven’t heard from the Mayor or the Governor yet today, but I assume they’re going to officially declare July 27 as Roxy Pelham Day. I’m pretty patient. I can wait.

Anyway, thanks in advance to all of my fans for sending along the birthday greetings and gifts. Since I have everything a girl could possibly want, feel free to order a copy of “Roxy’s Forever Home” in honor of my special day. Even though I hadn’t planned to lift a paw today, I will happily sign your copy in between my mani-pedi and my well-deserved naps.

Even though it’s summer, and I’ve been told I have no school visits until September, I’ve been invited to several appearances over the past couple of weeks at local libraries. Sure, I love meeting the kids and being the center of attention, but I had thought a famous girl like me could spend the summer in the Hamptons or someplace where other important, famous dogs vacation.

Can’t you just picture me lounging by the pool with Martha Stewart’s Sharkey and Francesca? Or mingling at a cocktail party with Jerry Seinfeld’s dog, Jose?

But noooo. I’m doing the public library circuit. It’s fine, really. I get to ride in the car without my annoying little brother. A zillion or so kids pet me and take my picture. And somebody always comes through with a treat.

Last week I spent a good hour sniffing these four kids, who smelled like they had a giant dog living in their house. I couldn’t identify the breed, but I could tell he was big.

Of course, I was right. They didn’t have money with them the day we met, and they couldn’t possibly leave without getting a copy of my awesome book, which, as you know, is all about me. So they promised to send a check and look what arrived in today’s mail: There’s a picture of them with a Mastiff.

I wonder if that big boy has a place in the Hamptons.

 

Things are kind of awkward around here these days. I don’t want to rub it in for Stuey, but I was recently awarded — for the second year in a row — Most Medium Dog in Farmington’s prestigious Doozy of a Dog Contest. While happily trotting up to retrieve my blue ribbon (which looks great with my eyes, by the way) I couldn’t help but feel bad for the slightly pathetic Stuey, who walked away with the dreaded second place red ribbon.

But I am, you know, famous. And Stuey? Well, he’s just a dog. Clearly, I am much more medium than he.

I do know how he feels, though. On that same fateful evening I was given a second ribbon, and I’m not especially proud of it. As you know, my expressive eyes are two of my best assets. But the contest judges declared that my eyes weren’t fabulous enough to win first or even second place. I’ve tried to jump high enough to grab the hideous reminder of my third place “honor” from the refrigerator so I can properly chew it up, but I can’t reach it.

Back to happier thoughts, I do wish to thank my many fans for their support. I never could have won the Most Medium Dog award without the backing of my fellow dogs and children who find me irresistible.

You like me! You really like me!